The Hard Conversation

When your loved one feels ready to call us, we will listen to them, understand what level of care they need and help them consider some steps they can take to start their treatment journey. Bringing up your concern with your Brother, Sister or family member can be challenging, but there are some helpful ways to go about it.

Choose a time to talk

Discuss when both of you are calm and when your loved one is not high, hungover, or experiencing a withdrawal. If they seem upset about their substance use or are talking about wanting to make a change, this would be a good time to chat with them about it.

Keep it brief

We don’t want them to tune out of the conversation. Have an idea of the important things you want to talk about beforehand, so you can keep it short and simple.

Stay positive

Tell your Brother, Sister or family member that you called us at Navigator, and explain why in a positive way. For example, “I’ve been worried about you, and I was hoping they could help me support you better.”

Avoid negative communication

Even those you care about may feel attacked, become upset or try to defend themselves rather than listen if you criticize or use extreme measures like ultimatums.

Support your loved one

Tell your Brother, Sister or family member how much you value and care for them and that you understand what they’re going through. For example, “I believe that you deserve a better life”, “I know this is really tough for you”.

Suggest calling Navigator

Ask them, “Is now an OK time for you to do something for me — to call the people at Navigator?” Suggest it in a positive way: “What would you think about speaking with the people I spoke with at Navigator?” Or “Would you be willing to give Navigator a call, to see what they have to offer?”

These guidelines are based on the empirically supported approach known as Community Reinforcement and Family Training (CRAFT).
See: Meyers RJ, Wolfe BL. Get Your Loved One Sober: Alternatives to Nagging, Pleading, and Threatening. Center City, MN: Hazelden, 2004.
Smith JE, Meyers RJ. Motivating Substance Abusers to Enter Treatment: Working With Family Members. New York, NY: The Guilford Press, 2004.

Image of a group counseling session discussing treatment options for substance use disorder

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How to explain what we do at Navigator

We listen carefully to their story, needs, and concerns so that we understand their full situation

Our goal is to explore what your Brother, Sister or family member is going through, how their life is impacted, and what they hope to achieve

We’ll ask specific questions so we can offer the best options to suit your needs and their situation and concerns

We are here to offer help. We will not pressure them. We respect that this is their choice and their timeframe

We will not disclose their information. We understand that your Brother, Sister or family member may wish to keep their treatment private

If they are interested in receiving help, we’ll provide a local option that matches their needs and insurance coverage

Assure your Brother, Sister or family member that there are no obligations.
This is only an initial conversation, not a commitment to go to treatment

When they speak to a Navigator Care Consultant, their personal situation will
always be treated with the utmost care and respect.

We provide
guidance
We practice
discretion
We embrace
acceptance
We inspire
confidence

Support when
you need it

Reaching out to others for support can help keep things from becoming overwhelming. You are always welcome to call a Navigator Care Consultant for confidential guidance on how to support your Brother, Sister or family member.

It could also help to connect with other friends and families of people managing substance use.

Image of two women having a discussion at an SUD treatment center